Sand fleas are a scourge that you should take seriously. Only at millimeter in size before attaching to a host, the sand flea is a parasite that feeds on humans and animals. While many sand flea bites are simply inconveniences, they can become serious problems.

A little red spot where the flea has bitten you is the initial sign of a sand flea bite. The sand flea bites’ reaction seems like that of a normal mosquito. Like the mosquito, they can transmit diseases. If you have been bitten by sand fleas, you may need to see a doctor, especially if symptoms of fever, swelling, hives and welts stay for more than a week. This may be a sign of a more serious problem.

There are some situations where a sand flea may turn parasitic. This is when they attach to a host by digging into the deeper layers of the skin and feeding on blood. The male and female sand fleas feed on blood, however the female is the biggest threat. Females don’t die immediately after mating and nest in the skin of its host which is unlike males. While they only start at one millimeter in size, sand fleas can grow up to one centimeter. This causes a lump to form under the skin. This is normally when people notice that there is a problem.

Unlike other types of fleas, sand fleas cannot be removed without the assistance of a physician. Stern infection can be caused by attempting to dig out a sand flea. If you have developed a lump under your skin, you should see your doctor immediately, as sand fleas will continue to grow and feed until you run danger of blood clots where you have been bitten. This sort of infection also increments the chance that you will have a disease transmitted to you from the sand fleas.

There are many ways that you can prevent sand fleas from biting you. Wearing long pants, socks and shoes when you visit the beach is the initial thing to do. If the fleas cannot permeate your clothing, they cannot bite you. There are many insect repellents that will target sand fleas as well. You run a lesser risk of exposure if you visit the beach during the day.

Many flea medications for animals will assist prevent your pet from suffering from sand flea bites.


88 thoughts on “Lupus Family Members

  1. roxemarie

    Is it possible to have lupus even though non of your family has lupus?
    I have tested positive for lupus, and I have many lupus symptoms. My doctors believe I may have lupus, but I have not been officially diagnosed with lupus. All of my family members are very healthy. No one in my family has any illnesses. No one in my family has ever had any type of autoimmune disease. I am the first and only person. Is this possible and how could this be?

  2. love4ever

    Has anyone lost a family member from lupus?
    I lost my mother last year on the 27th of December just after christmas . She has SLE for almost a year and i miss her so much. I dont feel celebrating the festive season or even newyears. I miss her so much

    1. abdelmoaty_ismailia

      i am very sorry for your mother’s death,and sorry for you for such an unhappy Christmas without her,we and you just praying for her,and hoping the science can save those lives of our lovers.
      one day ,i never forget, our professor rushed in the lecture room,shouting with anger ,and pulling a young lady with him,with a red sun burnt face, he said: shame on the one who said to this woman ‘ you have only a sun burn ‘ and let her go, today she is coming with a fatal stage of Systemic Lupus,he said may God not to forgive who did this….
      since that moment ,i never let my patient go until i am sure..
      Delay in such diagnosis leads to advance of the disorder toward the end..

  3. Pig tails and Love

    How to cope with the death of a family member that lived at home with you?
    My step-father just died yesterday in the hospital. He was a little delirious and had a high fever and blood sugar and labored breathing. He suffered from Lupus for 22 years and as result of his medication he developed diabetes and was overweight. The doctors thought it was many things but now they don’t know. He’s been in the hospital for little over a week. I went to visit him yesterday in and out the room, then after the chaplain prayed over him his blood pressure dropped and he died.

    His stuff is all over the house, and every time I see it start crying. And I don’t know what to do about my poor mother. How long will I have to go on like this? We have to make funeral arrangements and see people and I’m a mess.

    Please only serious suggestions or answers.

  4. Katie

    How do I stop being such a hypochondriac?
    I’m 15 and before I went to a new school when I was 12, I started a hypochondriac. I first though there was something wrong with my heart, then a brain tumor, diabetes, cancer, multiple sclerosis, lupus, the list could go on forever. I also think that a symptom I have is a serious illness. Sometimes I will just get so scared and frustrated that I’ll cry. Also if I hear about a disease, I automatically think I have it.I also tell my family members about my ‘diseases’ and ask my mom to bring me to the doctor all the time. How do I stop being a hypochondriac?
    Thanks!
    I only think I’m a hypochondriac because people tell me I am

  5. Anonymous

    I suffer from advanced rheumatoid arthritis It inflames all systems.What are symptoms of Lupus?
    I’ve had 6 joint replacements & 10 surgeries. But still suffer from flu-like digestive sys inflamation. No dairy, eggs, meat; vegan diet with herbal and other suppliments. At least I can walk, but the selfishness and cruel judgeing from biological family members and others causes me to grieve, because I love and pray for them and myself. Jesus wept a lot too. Ability to love is not about others; It’s about oneself, and God is the only witness that sees true.It is the small gestures of kindness and mercy that have the greatest meaning to someone who suffers. You don’t have to rescue them; just acknowledge them as still part of humanity. Go to others with something to share, and not with emptyness expecting others to fill you. Only you can rescue you from false identity, and still love. Purify your thoughts and heartfelt intentions. That’s what we’re here to learn. We are not our bodies. This world is only a shadow of the true world.

    1. Donna M

      There are two types of Lupus:
      Discoid lupus erythematosus (DLE)
      and Systemic lupus erythematosus (SLE)

      The only symptom of DLE is a butterfly-shaped facial rash that may spread to the forehead or the scalp.

      Symptoms of SLE include facial rash, fever, fatigue and malaise, joint and muscle pain, weight loss, hair loss, sensitivity to the sun, mouth sores, vulnerability to illness, enlarged lymph nodes, nausea, constipation or diarrhea, recurring bladder infections, and presence of lupus antibodies in the blood.

      As a side note, have you every tried Bach Flower Remedies. Edward Bach’s theories on illness might interest you, so if you can find his book Heal Thyself, you’d learn a lot.
      His research has shown that people who develop arthritis and other diseases leading to stiffness or rigidity is a reflection of the same in the person’s character or mindset.
      I’m not accusing you of anything here, please understand. I read the book a couple of weeks ago, to learn more about myself and why I’m prone to certain things. It took a couple of days to get my head around it, but it’s powerful stuff.
      Good luck, hon 🙂

  6. euqor♥

    sister was diagnosed with lupus?
    hi. my sister was recently diagnosed with lupus and i just wanted to know as much as i can about it. ive tried to read up as much as i can about it as soon i found out but i guess i wanted to hear from people who have experienced family members diagnosed with the disease or who have it themselves. i want to be able to be there for her and support her in any way possible.

    thanks.
    i guess thanks for responding at least “f” but somehow it wasnt very helpful. youre welcome for your 2 pts

  7. Manic Mamma

    Jehovah’s Witnesses – if your beliefs are bible based?
    then do they only apply to you?
    My foster mother is a Jehovah’s Witness, and as we all know, it goes against the grain to accept a blood transfusion. However, my aunt, who is not a JW, is sick with lupus. The doctors were unable to contact any immediate family members, but were able to contact my foster mother. She signed the release form, allowing the doctors to give my aunt a blood transfusion. Since your belief to not accept any blood transfusions is bible based, is it not safe to say that you should practice what you preach? I know that if I needed one, she would have left me to die. What say you to that?
    My aunt is related, my biological mother’s brother’s wife. My foster mother is obviously not related. She is the wife of an elder who used to belong to the Alberton South congregation in JHB, South Africa. Any more stupid questions about credibility? Would you like her name too?
    Jadore: I have no more contact with the club, but am trying to find out which location she has moved to, I would really like to report her, because I feel that this is an act of hypocrisy, don’t you agree?
    My aunt only told me about it in January, which is when I returned to the country. Since I was disfellowshipped in 1996, I have not had any contact with my foster mother, as she and my foster father as well as their two daughters and the rest of the congregation followed the society’s direction to stop associating with me. I’ll give you my aunt’s phone number and you can ask her about the date, the hospital, etc. Are your aggressive questions a response to feeling like you’re in a corner?
    Jadore: here’s the details, I just spoke to my aunt. apparently it was an emergency, and the hospital was unable to contact my uncle. my foster mother just happened to be visiting my aunt at the time, and that is how she happened to sign the papers. if you know anything about anything, you will know that south africans don’t really care too much about following protocol, as long as they get a signature.
    Jadore: here’s the details, I just spoke to my aunt. apparently it was an emergency, and the hospital was unable to contact my uncle. my foster mother just happened to be visiting my aunt at the time, and that is how she happened to sign the papers. if you know anything about anything, you will know that south africans don’t really care too much about following protocol, as long as they get a signature.
    Jadore: here’s the details, I just spoke to my aunt. apparently it was an emergency, and the hospital was unable to contact my uncle. my foster mother just happened to be visiting my aunt at the time, and that is how she happened to sign the papers. if you know anything about anything, you will know that south africans don’t really care too much about following protocol, as long as they get a signature. it happened at the Union Hospital.
    Jadore: here’s the details, I just spoke to my aunt. apparently it was an emergency, and the hospital was unable to contact my uncle. my foster mother just happened to be visiting my aunt at the time, and that is how she happened to sign the papers. if you know anything about anything, you will know that south africans don’t really care too much about following protocol, as long as they get a signature. it happened at the Union Hospital. are you even a JW?
    Jadore: here’s the details, I just spoke to my aunt. apparently it was an emergency, and the hospital was unable to contact my uncle. my foster mother just happened to be visiting my aunt at the time, and that is how she happened to sign the papers. if you know anything about anything, you will know that south africans don’t really care too much about following protocol, as long as they get a signature. it happened at the Union Hospital. are you even a JW? would you like to know if she was on her period that day?
    sorry… LOL, computer glitch!

    1. The Truth™

      Sounds like your foster mother is very selective. Technically, by signing the release form should have bothered her “bible trained conscience”. Some JWs may have opted NOT to sign.
      It’s just another one of the double standards JWs can have! Just like it’s ok that they are kind to non-believers but treat ex-believers as if they are criminals!…and on top of it…it’s NOT ok to have a meal with exJW family but perfectly OK to debate online with exJWs that they don’t even know! Sick!

      Yes, blood is sacred. So is LIFE itself!

      edit: “find it odd that those who are opposed to JWs’ position on blood say little or nothing about the wanton slaughter of aborted babies worldwide or the spilling of human blood in warfare. Such hypocrisy!”

      WHO is this person talking about? Generalizing those who are against JWs stand on blood are now all PRO abortion and PRO war? Hypocrisy? Hypocrisy is being online discussing these issues with ex-JWs in the first place…when we KNOW what you believe and what your taught….therefore we are in a very good position to be objective AND reasonable…..not narrow-minded and brainwashed!

  8. DewDrop

    how long should i wait to be tested for lupus??
    Two of my cloose family members suffer from lupus, and i have been advised to go get tested. I don’t know how long i should wait to go to the docs to talk to him about it. I am 18 and in the middle of my alevels, in my last year, and suffering from frequent headaches at the moment.

    can someone help with the confusion as i been told it should wait, but there agian to prioritise things.
    and any hidden sites? i know about some of the lupus research and support ones.

    thanks
    i do have joint pains. I did have two strange spots under my eyes, a bit like normal spots except they didnt go away from about three months, and didn’t have anything in them. Thanks for making me remember to help by putting more info on for the person wit the first answer.
    I am studying health and socail care and i have looked alot in to lupus….
    I am waiting because i find it difficult to get the doctors because of my dads workig hours, he is my only transort and it is unfair to get him to knock off work early jsut to take me tot he docs when i am not really really ill… Its really complicated as my mum can’t drive due to medication she is on. I am waiting until i have time, as well as i am in the midst of my last year of sixth form. A-levels are harder than getting a degree…..seriously harder, u have so many subjects to do at once, at least a degree u do one subject thats sometimes widely spread

    1. gillianprowe

      When you have some free time, go see a Doc and tell him your worry. If I was your Doc listening to this, then I would think, well I do some blood tests anyway and see what the results are. Now it might be all the blood tests come back Normal, in which case your fear and worry have been solved. On the other hand it might be that certain tests return abnormal. Lupus is a autoimmune condition, BUT that does not mean you have Lupus, however it could mean you have another autoimmune condition. Therefore having a blood test could save your life. I do not want to panic you, but a Friend of a friend. Her Mother is in Politics and daughter took off to US, with Husband to start their life. The daughter was healthy. Three months later the husband came home from work and the wife was dead on the couch? They had the Autopsy and found out she had undiagnosed Lupus! She had no symptoms, no signs, was healthy, was jogging with Husband, never complained to her Mother that she felt unwell, tired, exhausted, nothing. I have read that several people had heart attacks, ambulance called, taken to Hospital and they eventually diagnosed Lupus!
      I think you are a positive person because you know it is in your family and you are wondering if you should be tested, so that is what they term positive health approach. Good Luck

  9. Cristina I

    Anyone have any ideas for a funny play on words slogan/team name for a lupus walk?
    I am signing up for the NYC lupus walk in October and I’m trying to figure out a good team name. Many use their family names or business however it’s a mix of friends, co workers, and family members. I am looking for something funny/cute/creative unfortunately I can not think of anything lol. Any ideas?

  10. EvArtD

    By-Pass, Lap Band and Lupus/Fibromyalgia Patients…..?
    I am 40 yrs old. Female, About 328 lbs (stable weight for several years). I have Lupus and Fibromylagia which cause me a great deal of pain.

    The Fibro and Lupus are becoming a great disability and I know my weight isn’t helping the issues at all. I am on about a dozen different meds a day just to function. I’ve tried to diet and I don’t lose anything, not even water weight. I’ve been thinking for a few years about having the by-pass or lap band surgery but I’m really scared on so many levels.

    Please share your experience and weather you would do it again or not. I’d even love to hear from family members of weight loss surgery patients, especially if they had/have Lupus and/or Fibro.

    1. crimsonshedemon

      I have lupus and fibromyalgia also. Losing weight can only help… not only SLE and FMS but your overall well-being. I also take a lot of medication and it’s not fun.
      Good luck to you!

  11. jaskoran

    What can I do, my wife is ill: I have a mental health issue & stress issues caused by a disfunctional family?
    I have 3 of a family and an alcoholic wife who has Lupus, Diabetes, Epilepsy and may also have other problems. The 3 adult members of my family take advantage at every turn and I have been forced to get a motability 7 seat car. There are only 2 of us living in the 5 apt house with a mortgage paid with my wife’s wages and DLA for both of us. I have also got a Tax Credit and Carer’s Allowance. So we have about enough coming in. Problem is we have a daughter and 3 granddaughters who take advantage by not paying for any costs they incur especially with petrol prices being so high and Xmas looming. Paper is cheap by the sheet but when you count up 9 years of prolific art & writing from a highly intelligent granddaughter and 2 younger siblings you might just realise where I am coming from. The other daughter has problems that she cannot deal with and a son who we cannot visit because of wife’s work commitments. Stress is only the start of it!

    1. LemonZest

      Oh bless you, Im ever so sorry for you and your wife, but unfortunately I don’t have a proper answer, so here’s my advice: get some counselling and talk to someone– you’ll feel a lot better. Talk first and when you feel ready to tackle some of your situations, then is the time you will achieve a lot more.
      Best wishes and good luck 🙂

  12. meggie is back!

    Do I have it or not??? 10 points for the best answer!!!!?
    I have 3 autoimmune diseases and I think I have another, it’s Lupus. One of my family members had it too. Here are te symptoms I have:

    A rash on my face
    Chest pain (minor)
    fatigue
    Head ache
    Loss of appetite
    Loss of weight

    Please help! Big reward!!!
    Oh, and I have a doctors appointment set up, but they couldn’t get me in untile May 25th.
    Yes, lots of joint pain, however it could be from other problems such as my fibromialgia.

    P.s. I’m 14, so all of y’all telling me to go to the doctor, I can’t until my mommy takes me May 25th!!!
    Thank y’all, i appeiciate your input, whatever it may be. 🙂

    1. Chris

      These symptoms could really be the signs of almost anything. However, if your family has a history of Lupus, and you have several other autoimmune diseases, then it’s a definite possibility. The best thing to do would be to go to a doctor to check if you have it.

      If these are the only symptoms you are experiencing, then you probably do not have Lupus. Do you get a photosensitive rash (one that occurs after skin exposure to direct sunlight)? Any joint pain? Make sure to tell your doctor about ANY symptoms you have been having, no matter how irrelevant they may seem.

  13. Julia

    Lupus Remission?
    Does lupus go into remission? My ex family member told me she had it years ago but then said it turns out she tested negative and lied. Well now about three years later she’s telling me that she is being tested again and could have had it all along. But yet the test was negative last time.
    I think she’s bipolar. She self diagnoses and I think she needs to add bipolar to the list. Is there anyway besides her being nice one minute them making the devil look like a saint to test it?

    1. Kir S

      There is no specific lupus test the way there is a test for HIV or anemia. Lupus is diagnosed after a whole bunch of tests are done, along with symptoms that suggest lupus. My mother has lupus, and it took months before they came to the conclusion that she had it. One of the common tests done that suggests lupus is the ANA test. It can be elevated and not specifically suggest lupus. My mom occasionally has a normal ANA test because her lupus is under control. The thing to remember is that a lupus diagnosis is difficult to come by, and requires a battery of tests and elimination of other problems that can cause the same results. If she’s saying she’s having a “lupus test” done, she’s either ill informed or lying.

  14. і ♥ нім

    My family is screwed up =[ & it’s affecting my grandmother?
    My grandmother obviously has a drug problem. It’s been discussed by several members of my family & everybody just sits back & lets it happen. She has my uncle & his wife & kids living there ( my uncle has a drug & alcohol problem & his wife has a drug problem ). It’s severely effecting our entire family. She takes medicines for blood pressure & things like that, but she also takes Xanax. It was prescribed to her when her mother died. But now she can’t function without them. She takes like 6 pills a day ( .5mg each ) which is a lot.

    My uncle lives with her & he is HUGE burden on her. Him & his family have so many problems it’s crazy. My uncle got the gastric bypass surgery a few years ago & did great. But now he doesn’t work because he has something wrong with his hip. No matter what, there’s always a reason why he can’t work. My uncle’s wife is a dead woman walking. In the past 2 years she’s claimed to have breast cancer, lupus, uterine cancer, brain cancer & a few other things. They have a 13 year old daughter that just confided in me & told me that she thinks she’s pregnant. They have a 17 year old son who dropped out of school, doesn’t work (none of them work) & has a girlfriend that’s coming to live in my grandmother’s house also.

    The rest of the family refuses to go over to my grandmother’s house because my uncle’s vicious dog is there. I can’t go over there because they have 2 cats & I’m highly allergic. The house is a huge mess. It stinks.

    On Mother’s Day my grandmother came to my house & told me & my mom that my uncle tried to commit suicide saying that he has nothing to offer anyone.

    I feel so bad for my grandmother. I don’t know what to do. Is there anything I can do? I know there’s senior services, but how do I contact them? What do I say? I don’t want to make my family upset. I’m 21 years old, so it’s not like I’m a child. It’s really upsetting to see my grandmother going through this. =[

    1. Mary P

      Social services from your town, city, county, or state should be notified by you or your parents. They may find that senior abuse of your grandmother is going on in that house, besides the responsible adults not being able to care for themselves. The kids may be better off in foster homes.

  15. mshelton13

    What do I do when family are trying to mistreat a retarted family member?
    It isn’t as bad as it sounds, he isn’t getting beaten but…The problem is my mother n law is moving in with us. Her brother is retarted and he will have to move out of where he is currently. The other sister has control over his money, not the sister he lives with. Well her kids don’t want her to give up the money so they want to move him in the worst apts in town. He would probably get killed in the first two weeks. She doesn’t want him to live with her because she has lupus and she takes care of her grandson. So they mistreat him and it isn’t fair. How do I turn her in where she doesn’t have control of his money. Who do I contact? This can’t happen.

    1. abbasgirl

      Call the information line in your city. Ask if there is an organization that advocates for the rights of adults with disabilities. If you can’t find an information line check the telephone directory and find any organization that works with individuals with disabilities in your area. They should be able to direct you to an appropriate organization or to the contact number for social services.

  16. Demetria

    I need help with my psycho legal guardian?
    I am in a bit of a tight situation living at home currently with my legal guardian. I am 20 and I have lupus, and my aunt (who is my only legal guardian) is absolutely insane. Before I was 18 she was physically and emotionally abusive. She has previously threatened to kill me and herself. The last physical altercation we had was in January of this year. She threw me on to the ground, and I tried to fight back, but she is much stronger than me. I want to have her committed, but I don’t know how I would go about that. The reason I stick around is because she is the only way I can afford the health care that I need in my condition. I have family members in PA, but if I move there she threatens to discontinue my health insurance. I know this is all very complicated, but I am running out of options. I feel that she is a danger to herself and others.

    1. mgunnycappo

      first off she is no longer your ‘legal’ guardian. she may be considered a guardian for the sake of insurance but she has no legal obligation to you…nor you to her. the only way she can be ‘committed’ is if she poses a danger to herself or others. this would have to be proven in a court of law…not that she’s just a bitch but that she is actually a danger.

      there are other options for you regarding insurance. all states have high risk insurance pools for people in your situation, who cannot get private insurance due to pre existing illness. these are on a pro rated scale based on your income. if you have no income then you’ll qualify for state sponsored insurance at no cost to you.

      there are options out there you just have to look for them. additionally, if your lupus keeps you from working you would also qualify for disability.

  17. Tanya Red

    please help, its about my mom.?
    my mom is whats known as a maintenance drinker.
    it means if she doesn’t have a certain amount of alcohol in her body she will start drinking.
    the worst part?:
    when she is drinking she says horrible things to me.. and sometimes it hurts a lot. but i try not to show it.
    also she’ll act like it never happened or that she has not been drinking.
    only a few days ago she drank to much and he pupils dilated, her pulse and heart beat stopped three times! she will have days of these spells. i am only 12! on my twelfth birthday party i had invited the boys in my class and i was the first girl to do that so it was a big deal and she was drinking through out it, it killed me inside!
    she also has epilepsy and lupus which are two very dangerous diseases and i worry that her drinking will clash with the meds and make her sick.
    she has been to rehab and we all tried talking to her but she wouldnt listen and the next day she tried to kill herself.
    my parents are divorced. i can’t live with my dad because he is hits me sometimes and i cant stand my stepmom and her kids.
    if i talk to a family member then they will fight with her i will get in trouble.
    the saddest part yet is that when she is sober she is the coolest best mom ever no matter what! we laugh, joke talk and all my friends love her, she helps me with every problem i have and i can tell she loves me like anything.
    what i dont get is that if she loves me so much, why doesnt she quite drinking??

  18. clairdeluny

    Can you help me diagnose myself?
    Generally I’m good at diagnosing myself and family members but I’m a bit stumped. Although I realize that none of this takes the place of professional medical advice (aka Doctor) I’m one of those people who will obsess until I get some kind of an answer. So, here goes my symptoms and history:

    1. Positive ANA, negative RA, possibly anemic, myoclonic seizures (the seizures are those little jerking/spasms of the muscles but other than annoying me present no problem in and of itself)
    2. Ankylosing spondylitis was tested and discarded a couple of years back, as were lyme disease and osteoarthritis. The last rheumatologist I saw just left a diagnosis of undifferentiated connective tissue disease. Our best guess is maybe lupus, but I lost insurance before we finished testing.
    3. Current symptoms- lower spine just above/around hips is swollen but not tender to the touch. That said, pain does radiate from there throughout hips and upper back to legs, along with a pinching sensation of pain sometimes.
    4. Throughout out the day I’ll start to feel like (I’m trying to describe this accurately) ice water is running through my veins, but I’m not feverish and I don’t feel cold externally. Sometimes I’ll feel flushed during all of this. The best way to describe it is that feeling you get when something starts to go numb on you, before you get the blood flowing again.
    5. Might not be related, but my voice is shot to heck and back but no sore throat.

    Basically I hurt, feel run down and lethargic, but other than the pain and symptoms I don’t actually feel sick, as in need to go to the ER sick (my only option without insurance at this point!) Help, anyone?
    I forgot to add one last thing, perhaps the most critical: I’ve been taking massive amounts of Tylenol to deal with the pain (not successful obviously!) I know it’s toxic to the livers so I’d appreciate if we’d gloss over that, since I get no personal enjoyment or high from the Tylenol other than taking the edge off the pain. That being said, that is the only medicine I’m taking (Tylenol and Tylenol PM)
    I appreciate the answers, but let’s backtrack to the part where I said I don’t have insurance, which is the main reason I’m doing this. Once I have my top five fave diagnosis I’ll at least be able narrow the specialists on my list and continue saving for the visit, but until then let’s keep trying to diagnose me!

    1. Cori

      Can’t give diagnosis without further testing- a positive ANA makes me worry- sounds a LOT like Lupus. Ice water feeling through veins sounds bad- remember that women have strange heart attack symptoms, so if it moves to arm or upper back, get to ER. As far as the possible anemia- you probably know this- eat lots more dark greens to up your iron count. Just that may help you get more energy. Sounds like you need to look into getting medicare/caid- you need to figure out what’s going on. High WBC counts can lead to so many conclusions…hope you figure this out- be careful not to misdiagnose yourself then treat based on your own dx.

  19. Walton

    Autoimmune Disorders? Particularly for those with medical backgrounds…?
    A loved one of mine – a female in her 20s – has an undiagnosed medical issue and I’m seeking ideas.

    We’ve been to countless doctors, many of which agree it may be some sort of autoimmune disorder, but what it is exactly has been difficult to pinpoint. It started around 2 years ago when various sores/scabs started appearing on her arms and legs. These really weren’t/aren’t as ghastly as they might sound – they were your average run-of-the-mill sore: circular in nature, ranging from around the size of a pencil eraser to 2 or 3 times that large…Initially it was thought there might have been some practical cause surrounding them, such as scraping herself accidentally in the kitchen or while asleep. But as time went on, we realized that this wasn’t the case. Some have healed, but only slowly and leaving faint scars…Others have yet to heal and new ones begin….There might be a half dozen on each leg/arm…The only other syptom is slight fatigue, as she has known she is borderline anemic since she was a teenager.

    Anyway, we’ve been to GPs, dermatoligist, allergist, and at least one other specialist. They have ran ANA blood tests, CBC blood tests, taken biopsies for cancer, tested for lupus (a suspected culprit for a while because she’s had family members with this condition), tested for autoimmune disorders,
    tested for allergies, gluten tests, and much more…

    None of this yielded anything really…We found out about some light allergies she has, but nothing significant enough to trigger this…Recently went in again and run some of the same tests over again, still awaiting test results, but not extremely hopeful since we’ve been through this before and there is supposedly a great deal of accuracy with most of these tests.

    So any ideas ? Do this sound auto-immune in nature or more like a environmental cause such as a food allergy ? If its autoimmune what might it be ? Given the duration and no other side effects might that point to anything ? None of these symptoms have greatly altered her lifestyle, she still maintains a job and attends graduate school, but its been psychologically stresful for all of us…Any help is appreciated.
    Some are in fact cystic in nature, and her mother had ovarian issues.

    1. Bco4th6th

      I don’t know whether this will help, but one of the first things I would is to start preventive treatments that will either take care of some unknown issue or rule it out.

      This sounds complicated, I know – and I apologize.

      What I mean is, around 75% of people’s health problems that aren’t inherited or injury-related are caused by unintentional dehydration – low water and salt levels. Water and salt make up about 75% of the body’s tissues (the number is just a coincidence), 85% of the brain and 94% of the blood.

      Because the medical community has convinced them that water has little or no nutritional value and is therefore unimportant, and because they warn people to cut back on salt, people are developing health problems that never existed only decades before.

      The current advice that doctors give is to “drink plenty of fluids”. But “fluids” don’t necessarily translate into “water”, and since water is unexciting, people opt for soft drinks, coffee, energy drinks and other alternatives. These drinks do not supply the body with the needed water, even though they may contain water. This is a common misconception that is fueled by the doctors’ advice (they went to medical school, so they couldn’t possibly be wrong). These drinks act like a diuretic and actually pull water out of the body at a rate of nearly 50% more than the water they’re providing.

      The body runs on water, and it won’t accept anything else (other than some natural fruit juices in small to moderate amounts).

      Click on the link below to learn the proper way to correct dehydration.

      One other thing you might consider is Oil of Wild Oregano and/or some other natural herb. Oil of Oregano kills harmful bacteria and is effective on many viruses. If this is the problem that your loved one has, this stuff should take care of it.

      The best thing is, both of these treatments (water/salt and oil of oregano) are natural and has no side effects other than improving ones health. They are completely compatible with any prescription or over-the-counter medication a person may be taking.

  20. hb

    My mother and Grandmother both had lupus and died from it…?
    I want to be tested for it. Do you know what kind of test they will give me when i go to the dr. I am 18 and stay sick and very tired all the time. I want to rule out Lupus as the cause of my sickness. If I do have it does anyone know if there are ways to deal with it without being on tons of meds? Both my family members were on to many meds.

    1. Linda R

      A diagnosis of lupus is based on these things:
      1. Medical history
      2. Symptoms
      3. A variety of lab tests
      4. After other disorders that cause the same symptoms are ruled out.

      Diagnosing lupus take a good medical detective.

      If you do have it, then meds may be necessary. I would rather deal with my meds than deal with the organ complications from my lupus. In fact, each time I take my meds I am thankful that I live in a time and place where doctors know what it is and how to treat it. 20 years ago, you could expect to live maybe 5 years after a lupus diagnosis. Now the vast majority of lupus patients WHO FOLLOW THEIR TREATMENT PLAN can expect to live a normal life span.

      The decision to take medication always involves two things: risks and benefits. Each person has to weigh the evidence. For me, I was able to return to a full active life and work to support myself (I am 56) instead of being home on disability and living in poverty. The decision was a no brainer for me.

      Good luck to you. Learn everything you can about lupus. It is the first step in self-managing.

  21. zoe!

    someone tell me honestly, how serious is Lupus disease?
    my friend’s aunt, who is in her early 40s and has had arthritis for a very long time has been diagnosed with Lupus disease. She’s really upset but I don’t really understand what this means, and how serious it is? A member of her extended family died from Lupus a few years ago.

    1. Agnodice

      Lupus can have varying degrees of severity and different organ involvement. Lupus can be a very serious, potentially fatal disease even with treatment.

  22. chersgaz

    What is Lupus?
    a family member of mine has been diagnosed with lupus. what i would love to know is this : is this disease easily controllable (his blood tests came back off the chart)
    :what kind of life can he expect to have ?
    any information i would be greatly thankful for.

    1. mgnysgtcappo

      Lupus is an auto immune disease. The body’s immune system attacks both good and bad cells, killing everything in it’s path…basically an over active immune system. There are varing stages of the disease and various levels of organ involvement. Every case of Lupus is different which is one of the reasons it is so difficult to diagnose. Some people never get organ involvement and have relatively mild symptoms of joint pain and fatigue. Others have severe organ involvement where Lupus attacks the kidneys (Lupus Nephritis), heart, brain, lungs, GI tract, Liver. It is considered systemic for this reason. Over 50% of people diagnosed with Lupus will have some type of kidney involvement from mild to severe. Lupus can also cause depression.

      Medications used to treat Lupus include steroids (prednisone and Methotrexate), immunosuppressants (Cellcept and Myfortic) and chemotherapy agents (Cytoxan and Rituxan). Plaquenil (an antimalarial) is still used with some patients but it’s use is considered antiquated.

      My wife was diagnosed with Lupus at age 15. She is now 30. She has severe organ involved Lupus that has attacked her kidneys and her heart. Last year she had eight heart attacks and had a defibulator/pacemaker put in.

      That being said we live a relatively normal life inspite of her illness. We have two adopted children. She is a practicing dentist and we live to the fullest. Sure there are days when she can’t get out of bed. Those are the times that we make her breakfast in bed and rent her movies. We have our yearly treks to the hospital sometimes lasting for weeks or months. We see pretty much every specialist in the book on a monthly basis. But we have a great life. I wouldn’t change it for the world.

      My point is that the life your family member can expect to have is the one he makes. One can chose to wallow in their suffering (and believe me there is a lot of suffering) or you can chose to do everything possible each and every day to fight, never giving up or giving in.

      Joining Lupus support groups can be very helpful to get the latest news and talk with people who have been through it. My wife and I run two Lupus support groups, one for the Lupus patient and one for the family and friends affected by this disease.

      I wish you and your family every good thing in the future.

  23. Amethyst

    what are the beginning signs of skin cancer?
    my mom keeps getting these things on her arms that itch her and they bleed and then scab and she has a lot of them. she has lupus and i dunno if it’s from her lupus or if its a sign of skin cancer or not… cancer runs in my family. i’ve had 3 family members that i know of die of some kinda cancer and they were all on my mom’s side. and i’m very worried that it could be really bad.

    1. Medical Student

      Since I cannot see the “things” in person, I cannot be a 100% sure. It is very possible it is because of lupus because depending on the type of lupus, skin eruptions are often seen. I would highly recommend you take your mom to see a dermatologist to get it looked at. If the patches are asymmetrical, change in color, have irregular borders, and change in size then it is definitely serious.

      Also if there is a high rate of skin cancer in your family I would highly recommend wearing sunscreen when you are exposed to the sun. Excessive sun exposure is associated with a high incidence of skin cancer.

  24. sweetleka

    Diagnosing Lupus?
    I’ve been having some strange symptoms involving my immune system/lungs for a while now. There are members of my family with Lupus, but unfortunately I have no contact with them at this time. I’m going to see the doctor in about a week, but I would like to know if anyone knows of particular tests that I should ask to be done or particular symptoms/warning signs that make it pretty clear that I have it or something like it. Any help would be appreciated, I know I’m at the age that most people are diagnosed with it. PLEASE HELP. Thanx! 🙂

    1. mgnysgtcappo

      Ask for an ANA test. This is one indicator that a person has SLE. However, just having a positive ANA test doesn’t mean you have Lupus. You have to have four symptoms to be diagnosed.

      I’m confused why you mention that there are members of your family that have Lupus. I’m wondering how many actually have it and when/where they were diagnosed and what types of medications they take. You see Lupus has never been proven to be a genetic disease. Most of the research disproves a genetic link however environmental factors seem to play a part as well as some predetermined genetic factors. The chances you’ll have Lupus because someone in your family has it is the same chances that the general population will be diagnosed with Lupus. Remember the Lupus is more prevailant than breast cancer.

      As far as strange symptoms with your immune system can you be more specific? I’ve never really hear of a Lupus patient complaining of symptoms with their immune system. Usually, people present with joint pain, muscle weakness, rash, kidney/heart/brain issues. Lungs can be involved but usually only after a Lupus flare up has been occurring for a long while. I’d say that since you don’t complain of any joint pain that Lupus is highly unlikely.

      In any event, with an ANA test you’ll be able to rule out Lupus. If your ANA is positive, the doctor will order BUN, Creatine Clearance, a Chem-7 panel as well as a APS test. Bone density scans can also be taken if the disease has progressed and is causing arthritis. Organ biopsies are also indicated if the there appears to be organ involvement.

      Good Luck.

  25. Chaun

    How do you get rid of stress?
    And please don’t say that’s life, life’s tough, blah blah blah. My mom has been ill since last winter, we’ve just got her test results in and she has lupus. She’s been working shorter hours and well, I work full time and every cent goes to bills, not my bills though. Most of my money for school for this fall is gone, my savings is gone. I’m stressing about school, work, my mom’s health and to top it all off, three months ago my very ill sister was diagnosed with MS and this year alone I’ve lost 5 close family members, aunts, close cousins, an uncle. My other sister just moved home because she was homeless and has brought her problems along with her. My little brother and his girlfriend is having trouble and because they can’t come to some kind of compromise, my brother’s gf won’t let him see his son, and I miss my nephew so much.

    I need to get rid of this stress. I’m easily frustrated at the littlest things and I get angry and bitchy quickly too. Any advice? Thanks in advance.
    I just want to sleep the days away and not worry, unfortunately thats not possible. Any help would do.

    1. PAM d

      a few years ago my mom and grannie were sick and lost all my family and sometimes i would just take a walk or get on here an go to different forums and see if i couldnt talk to someone and in the process i got to escape from home but yet i didnt leave the house but i sure felt better and i also would turn on the radio late at night and take a bath with candles not much but sure did help

  26. GreenAppleGirl

    Brain shrinkage?
    My aunt has been diagnoised with brain atrophy (the shrinking of the cerebelum). The doctors can’t seem to find a cause for it, but she is experiencing lost of equilibrium, speech, motor skills and double vision. Has anyone had experience with this, either themselves or family members? Any ideas?
    **Her doctor as already ruled out Parkinson’s, Lupus, various forms of cancer, and MS

    1. leroux3s

      have them check for a stroke of the brain and/or brain stem
      this was my symptoms to after a surgery and a high fever and it baffled them for a while.
      when I saw the neurologist,she is the one that ordered the right tests and found out.
      I was only 42 at the time so it could/does happen to anyone

  27. curious

    when a family member works in the same clinic i go to and tell everyone my business that’s HIPAA violation?
    My mom is a medical assistant and i had to go in for treatment of my lupus but at the time i did not want noone to know i had lupus, and she told everyone. Isnt that violation of HIPAA even though we are family. She happened to look in my chart and saw it there and told everyone, now ppl are feeling sorry for me. I wanted to tell on my own time.

    1. Cheryl L

      Yes it is. HIPPA violations are serious and your mother should know that. Whatever is in your medical record is for you and your doctor to know. Anyone else is on a need to know basis. She had no right to look at your chart unless she was participating in your care. Even then she has no right to tell anyone what she saw in your chart. You can report the violation to the doctor’s office or to the Dept of Health for your state. Every state has a phone number you can call to complain about incidents just like this.

  28. JACKIE O.

    Freaked out about my dream, please help!!?
    I dreamed that my teeth were slowly crumbling down,like breaking into little bloody pieces and falling in to my hand,Im really worried because a close family member just got diagnosed with lupus erymathosa! If anyone can answer i will appreciate it!!!

    1. trotni

      To dream that you have rotten or decaying teeth means that you are concerned for your health and/or business. The recent news of a family member being diagnosed with a serious illness is simmering on the back of your mind, causing you to pay closer attention to things in your life you may normally ignore.

  29. stella

    Why should my color matter?
    There is this guy that i really love and he love me too but his family do not want him to date me because i am not of their race. At first neither of us cared how they felt but when i talked to his 12 year old color blind sister she opened my eyes to some things. This guy`s family really really needs him. I already knew that his dad was a cop who was killed in the line of duty but now i know that his mom has Lupus and he cares for her and the 12 year old by himself because his sister is always working to care for the mom financially,one of his brothers can`t emotionally see the mom like that so he stay away but give money to help and the other brother is mentally retarded and floats around to each family member weekly . Even the retarded one hate me .I know this guy`s family need him and he is so over worked but i also know that i love him but if this continue it may affect people that need and depend on him.He`s at the point where he wanna sneak and be with me but i don`t like that or wanna do that. Should i just get out of the way and believe there will be another or continue to date him knowing the stress this causes him? The 12 year old begged me to go away so that her family would be at peace again. I know that i will hurt either way.

  30. need2know

    If you visit a family member in the hospital,with I.T.P disease,can you give them infection?
    I wanted to go and visit with them.They tested negative for lupus and HIV. They have had transfusion and their spleen has to be removed because it is enlarged.
    A family member said it was best to not visit because they are at risk to catch something from visitors! But I can find any information on this!
    I don’t have flu or cold. Thanks for info.

    1. ckm1956

      Call the hospital & ask his/her nurse.

      Patients without a spleen are more susceptible to certain infections, but they are usually vaccinated against them soon after surgery.

  31. joeypandason01

    my best friend is dying, what do i do ?
    hii. well here’s the story. my best friend, has kidney lupus. she has recently gotten new pills which means she doesn’t have very much time left. she was diagnosed in 5th grade. the past family members who have had lupus only lived for 2 years with it, we’re in 7th grade. im so scared. a friend of mine, aleyris has recently died and our whole community was depressed. and i cant imagine what her best friends went through. in the end, im scared shitless. i don’t know how im going to survive without her by my side. shes like my sister. so please help. what should i do when shes gone ??

    1. L1

      Don’t worry about what you’re going to do when she’s gone, worry about now. She’s still around so pay attention to that. When she’s actually gone, come back and ask this same question and then I’ll answer it.
      In the mean time, make her final days awesome. Do something that you normally wouldn’t, just have fun with her.

  32. Natalie

    MANY HEALTH ISSUES HAPPENING AT ONCE?
    REcently over the past few days I’ve had some weird health issues all seeming to occur..FIrst of all, For a few days I was having chest pain in the same area in the center and a little bit to the left of my sternum. It was a tight feeling that i could feel get worse and then go away somewhat. It was a different kind of pain than i’ve felt before though. And then yesterday, the bottoms of my feet started itching uncontrolably until i ended up putting some cortizone creme on them. Also over the past few days my skin has been ITCHY in ALOT of areas of my body. In my hair, on my legs, on my feet, around my arms and arm pits. I freaked myself out when I looked at my arm in the mirror and saw huge welts that were red on my skin. Then I realized this is where I had been itching, but the welts and redness seems to appear with almost no effort or pressure at all where ive itched with my nails. Ive itched little areas on my face, and sure enough a BIG red blotch will appear and stay for a while. Its really weirding me out. Im only 25 , female, and have always been pretty much exceptionally healthy. Im kind of scared because Lupus is in my family in atleast one family member that I know of, and Im not sure if something like this could be related. If there are any medical professionals or ANYONE with a similar experience or have heard of anything like this PLEASE help me out. I have NO health insurance, so im not sure what to do. I’ve asked questions on here about the chest pains and people suggested places where they can help with little or no pay, but there is NOTHING like that in the town i live. Its very small..i guess if i had to I could travel. Im just not sure what to do!

    1. Andrea

      You’re probably having an allergic reaction to something. That would explain the welts, itchiness, redness and even the chest pains. Have you used any new detergents, soaps, new foods, shampoos, etc.? If so, they could be responsible.

      I really don’t think that your itching and chest pains have anything to do with each other honestly. I think you’ll be okay dear.

  33. SCC

    For those of you who are opposed to nationalized healthcare?
    Some of the comments sound like people think that anyone without healthcare coverage simply is not willing to pay for it.

    However, what about families who cannot find full time jobs and have to work 2-3 part time jobs to support their families in high unemployment areas

    What about employees who work for temp agencies and cannot get health insurance, or the coverage available will pay out no more than what you pay in premiums (or even less).

    What about those families who must remain at home to care for family members requiring around the clock care.

    What about low income families who make too much money to qualify for Medicaid, yet they are still barely above the federal poverty guidelines?

    What about those who are unemployed and cannot afford the COBRA premiums (even with the stimulus plan), or worse yet, cannot qualify for COBRA.

    What about those people who have health conditions that prevent them from working full time.

    What about those people who require medications in order to function on a job (issues such as chronic depression, bipolar disorder, diabetes, lupus, MS) or cannot handle any type of a full time job due to medical or mental issues?

    Do you sincerely feel that all of these people should just continue to go without treatment. Do you also realize that unpaid medical expenses are causing problems for medical practitioners in maintaining practices.

    Do I understand that you don’t care?

    1. Mv

      Unfortunatley yes – look at their pathetic responses – these are ignorant people who care nothing about anyone other than themselves and their money.

  34. crazygirl21

    How do I deal with my sister with lupus?
    I am trying to understand that she is in pain and probably depressed, but she has such a mean attitude towards me about everything. I try to help her with chores or the baby, but no matter how hard i try, I can’t do anything right, and she makes me feel like a worthless idiot, so I get offended and we argue. I just wonder if there is a way to cope with a sick family member who is very moody and takes it out on me.

    1. Emily♥

      Hi ! I am 11 years old & I was diagnosed with lupus . My family members tryed to make me feel happy all the time. If she is taking medicine that is probally why she is being rude to you because the medicing you take for Lupus makes you have mood swings and makes you depressed. It could also be that shes just very depressed because she is thinking about if she will die and shes probally scared. Just tell her that everything is going to be okay. & Like I said I am only 11 years old and I have ben dealing with Lupus for over 9 months and I get scared sometimes but I am used to it. If your sister just got diagnosed with this Lupus then it will probally take her some time give her like a week or month, i hope i helped, good luck =D

  35. Connie

    What to do if a family member is trying to destroy your world around you?
    Hi there is a family member that is trying to cause problems any way she can and one of the ways lately has been calling human services on my husband & I for a child protection concern. This is not the 1st time because we know that she has had human services at our door in the past. Now my mother-in-law has a disabled adult child in a wheel chair so she requires home health care. Ok..well needless to say the person that is causing all of us undue grief is a home health care nurse and she is working inside my mother-in-laws house. This nasty person has human services & home health care on her side because of her work credentials. Also she is worming her way around by making everyone feel sorry for her because she has lupus. My mother-in-law has been diagnosed with stomach cancer and now thanks to this lovely person….she has made it so we can not visit my husbands mom that may be dieing of cancer and also we can not go into her house for her birthday in two days because this is the way that this trouble making person has it set up through home care! Please help us someone……..

    1. traildawg

      Blood is thicker than water. Go and visit your MIL… what’s she gonna do? Call the police? I doubt it… she knows that you and your hubby have a legal right to see his mom. BTW… go to the party too! She is not going to make waves in front of the party guest.
      If for some reason… she denies you access to you MIL… contact an attorney.

  36. Sophia Wu

    What do you think of my college essay? Does it flow right?
    I wrote my Common App essay, but then copy and pasted it into letter format for one of my supplemental college essays for a college that doesn’t use the Common App (St. Mary’s.) Let me know if it still transitions and flows right.

    Essay Prompt #2: You are about to write your future college roommate a letter. Please provide the roommate with a personal story that will give him/her some insight into your personality.

    Dear Claire,

    My name is Sophia and I’m going to be your roommate next year. First of all, I’m so excited to meet you! I’ve been looking forward to going to St. Mary’s for a long time, so I hope we’ll have a great year together. Second, I’d like to tell you about a personal journey I went through during my junior year. It’s about how I overcame writer’s block through handling my problems. I think it’s important because it’s influenced so much of who I am today.

    I love that feeling of opening up a new document and seeing the blankness upon my laptop screen. It’s a page of promise and possibilities that range from the opening chapters of a novel to the thought-provoking comparative politics essay. I even love the sound of typing as I take my disorganized thoughts and craft them into powerful, coherent sentences. Every detail I notice, every emotion I feel, and every experience I encounter is displayed in front of me as I type. After hours of editing and re-editing, I can finally look upon my work and feel proud. I am a writer.

    Since I was a child, my favorite activities have been reading and writing. My mother used to tell me stories of how I would make her stay up all night reading books to me because I could never get enough of their excitement, even if it meant putting off sleep. As I grew a little older, I started making my own stories, filled with illustrations and the about-the-author excerpt on the back page. From handmade picture books, I transitioned into writing full-length fictional novels. I loved creating characters – mostly females who were a little older than me — and imagining their physical appearance, the sound of their voices, their lifestyles, and the people who would influence them. I wrote about young women who struggled with lost love, abuse, and regret, reflecting upon the struggles that people face every day.

    I found my inspiration through observing the way people react emotionally to their problems. I am a wallflower; I tend to witness the pain of others without ever going through it myself. I listened to my friends and family members confide their problems: abandonment, alcoholism, death, and divorce, to name a few. I was someone people turned to when they wanted someone to listen to them or provide a shoulder to cry on. It was easy for me to understand the emotions they were going through during these tough times, even if I didn’t fully understand all the details.

    However, during my junior year, I stopped writing. I had one of the worst cases of writer’s block; it was as if my constant flow of inspiration had come to an abrupt halt. Concurrently, my junior year was one of the most difficult years I have ever faced. The pressures of academics and social life had increased, but the problems at home were even more difficult. That year, I rarely ever saw my father. He worked and lived part-time in China, so he would come home every three or four months. Meanwhile, my mother’s lupus had worsened. I often had to miss school to stay home and take care of her. I hated watching her fade.

    It wasn’t until I went to China this summer that I started to see myself in a new light. Away from the stress of my problems, I felt freer, as if I could start over. I started to re-focus on doing the things that I loved, especially writing. Every day, I would write something new about myself. The more I expressed myself, the better I was able to sit back and take a more objective perspective on my problems, the same way I viewed my friends’ and family’s problems. I began to accept the fact that although I couldn’t control what happened to me, I could control how I managed it. Writing was therapeutic, and in turn, sparked a re-discovery of inspiration as I came to understand myself. The blank page on my laptop screen was once again full of promise and possibility.

    I’m glad that I had the opportunity to share this with you. I look forward to getting to know you – see you at St. Mary’s!

    Sincerely,
    Sophia

  37. Hugo G

    “Securing execution of documents by deception” In need of good advice?
    It’s a little complicated, and I’m still lacking in details, but here goes.
    On the 18th my mom was held at tarrant county jail for a warrant for her arrest. The warrant came from palo pinto county, and it’s for “secured execution of documents by deception”. From the little information I can get from my misinformed family members, a few years ago she gave her info to her immigrant sister in law to apply for food stamps. Eventually they were discovered, and my mom was made to pay the full amount. It’s a few years later, and although she’s paid the full amount, she was arrested and has been incarcerated with “no bond set”. After nearly a week she was finally transported to palo pinto county where they tell me that she has to stand before a judge of the district court. He refused to give me a time line of when this could happen. I dont have much information, but I need to find a way to get her out as soon as possible. She has systemic lupus that keeps her in bed most days, and fibromyalgia that is nearly incapacitating for her. I highly doubt she’s getting the medical attention that she needs, and everyone I try to ask for answers treats me like I myself am a criminal. I just want any advice that could point me in the right direction… your help is greatly appreciated.

  38. happy

    am i depressed or not? what should i do?
    This is a long story but i really need help and don’t know where to go:
    When I was born in 1995 my mum almost instantly got really sick with lupus ( if you don’t know what it is google it). I have three sisters all above 7 years older then me. My mum had brain anarchism’s (holes in brain idk if its the right word). She went in and out of surgery and her pills made her very aggressive, she made my entire family depressed, she would yell at us, make us feel guilty for nothing and really fuck with our minds. An example is she would prank call my sisters during sleepovers just to make sure they didnt have fun. She would false accuse us of things we didnt do and general made our lifes horrible. In year 4 i started cutting myself and writing suicide notes, i would use a pair of scissors and cut my fingers, i would do this at school and pretty fast my teachers talked to my parents, everything made me upset very upset, i have bad handwriting and would cry for hours about it, when my mum and dad asked me why i did what i did i said because of my handwriting. I went to a counsellour and they didnt really help but i pretended that it did and started cutting myself in secret, using knifes to cut my fingers not very deeply. Everything seemed fine but i was still feeling down alot. My mother started spending all of her time in a room named the smoking room so i would spend most of my time alone and scared to see her, i would hide when she came out. In year six i started cutting my arms with knifes a bit more deep nothing to bad. I stayed like this for a while cutting myself and being secretive about it until my mum and dad split up halfway through year 7. It was a bad time, my dad told my mum i wanted ful custody with him which was true, she said she hated me and never wanted to see again. I spent two weeks with my sister and then we got back together and my mum moved out and i started having depressive episodes ( for lack of a better word). I would feel like shit and wanted to die but i had no cause i had no idea why) i started seeing counsellours and it didnt help much at all, after a while seeing my mum was like torture i hated seeing her and she made me depressed. I stopped cutting myself halfway through year 8 and was feeling better. About 10 weeks ago my mum went into hospital with septecimia ( she was a massive chain smoker, drug addict (legal and i suspect pot) and alcoholic). She was the sickest i have ever seen her and she was really nice to us all, there were some scary times where we thought she was going to die but she lived. After 2 weeks of this we were told she was gonna die because the muscles around her lungs were too week from smoking. We were told she had 2 weeks to live but she died that night, i thought she wasnt gonna die that night so left, i was the only family member not there when she died, i feel guilty and bad about it. It was a shock and i started cutting myself about 8 weeks ago, i started with a razor ( the head of a shaver) but found it didnt cut enough, went to a stanley knife and started cutting myself deeply making blood drip down my arm. I keep seeing my mum basically dead in a hospital bed and all the questions like: Could i have saved her? Should i have visited her more often? Do i want her alive? Should she be alive? Did she decieve to die for what she did to us? and dreams like once i had a dream where i went back in time 6 months before she died and all i had to do was save her but i found that i didnt even know where to begin i didnt know how to save her. I lost my stanley knife and so have found this week paper cutting thing basically a round stanley knife except shaper. I have started having suicide thoughts worse then i did before, i get in adrenaline moods when i cut and have wanted to cut my viens on my wrist and neck. I was at a cliff and all i wanted was to jump off and stop thinking. I am cutting deeper know then i have ever cut before. Once i cut and my hand slipped and cut much deeper then i meant to, i was afraid i would need stitches but didnt tell anyone. My family knows about my depressive episodes but not about the cutting i hide alot of how i truely feel because im to afraid of their reactions. I have been told to exercise as like a natural anti-depressent but it doesnt do anything to my mood i still want to kill myself and still want to cut myself. I have attempted cutting myself with knifes but have found they dont cause as much pain or blood, i feel i am becoming addicted to losing blood and the pain that comes with it, at the moment i have about 30 cuts on my arm and more scars. I dont know what to do…..

    1. darkthunder

      Write a book right now i dont even care. That shit is book worthy, also if your cutting yourself then obviously your depressed. Listen though, now I know I’m just some guy from where ever answering this question. Don’t cut yourself come on now, like wtf is that going to achieve, honestly what. the. fuck. is that going to achieve? i dont know, i cant help you really but ill tell you who can. YOU, thats right when you feel like shit you punch that depression right in the face and keep on keepin on. you go RAWR fuck you depression and just get pumped. ALWAYS GET PUMPED, when your pumped shit just gets awesome, dont drink and do drugs that doesnt help, (drugs as in you know weed and acid and shit) listen to some good music not that bullshit music listen to something good and crazy that makes you go OMFG YES then jump up run around and do a backflip dance and fucking bust a move. Now you go download some david bowie, queen, skillet and meatloaf and some other kick ass bands and punch depression in the face. Email me you seem like youd be fun to chat with ill make you lol up a storm i dont care if i got to backhand you with my face thats right it doesnt make sense. Now if thou are interested, PM me and thy dreams shall come alive.

  39. Jessie

    Need Help planning a small budget wedding for a sick friend in NY…Any ideas etc. will be so much appreciated?
    I really need help! I need to plan a super cheap $1000 budget wedding/reception in Westchester County, NY or surrounding areas? I’m planning it for my very sick best friend(more like sister), who’s very sick and battling Lupus with a 1 year old at home. It will be a max. of 30 ppl, no kids. I have a volunteer to photograph(my hubby does it as his hobby ;),I’m doing the decor and table setting myself to save and I’m also paying for her gown & a friend is doing the music. We also have a family member who make professional cakes willing to give us a great deal on that as well, and we are having a yard sale to hopefully make some of the money to pay for the actual wedding bands. I just want it to be as special and elegant as it can be for her. She deserves it! Any help, ideas would be so appreciated! Cheap venues, food/bev., anything at all? thanks so much guys!
    Thanks so much guys. We weren’t planning to have any alcohol at all, only because she doesn’t drink anyway, so I was thinking of a cash bar. My main concern where am I gonna get food/bevs. , a place and decor for $1000?

  40. Kandie

    i have a family member who had lupus for 15 years, is it a killer?
    she had lupus for 15 years,
    i didnt know they live that long?
    she now has heart troubl with a pace maker
    is that caused by lupus?
    shes in her 70s now.
    she can talk on phone, she thinks postive
    but she cant lift over 5 pds she said,
    she lives way far away from me & we send cards, & talk on phone
    she sent a picture of her to me & she doesnt look good, why?
    please explain lupus to me,
    she hates discussing it

    1. Linda R

      Lupus used to be considered fatal. That is no longer the case. Most of us live a relatively normal life span if we take care of ourselves, see the doctor regularly, and follow our treatment plan.

      Lupus is just a part of who we are. Many of us prefer to focus on life and relationships rather than diease. After 15 years, why would she want to waste her precious time discussing lupus. It is what it is. However you can learn more at the site below. Click on “About Lupus.”

  41. Billy

    Can a time span for dying be determined from having lupus ?
    I have a family member that has said she has been given 18 months to live and it’s from lupus she say’s. Can a time frame be put on it ?

  42. blazn05

    Info on Navy Humanitarian Transfer?
    My husband is in the navy and his mom has lupus and was diagnosed with lung cancer recently. He has talked to his command about a HUMS transfer and they said he is eligible for approval. Can anyone tell me if there is specific paperwork we need to get from the command to be filled out? We have some information but it’s basically telling us to get written statements from the doctor and family members. The doctor says he needs a specific form or we can pay $12 a form for her medical records. (There are ALOT.) Also if we do get approved does the navy pay for the move? Any information from someone who knows or has been through this would be greatly appreciated,

    1. Mrsjvb

      if he is approved it will be a PCS move so yes it will be covered. he needs to talk to his NC or *shudder* go to PSD and get the necessary forms.

      basically you will need to show that there is literally NO one else who can step up to care for her and that her condition is terminal/short term( not expected to last more than 12 months) at the end of the 12 months if she is not improved you will have to request an extension. Compassionate Reassignments are meant to be short term so unless his mother is located near a major Installation that he has a good chance of being stationed at for regular duties, this is only a temporary solution.

  43. Maharial

    Drug-induced lupus, will it come back?
    A close family member of mine has had drug-induced lupus (it took him over 8 months to be symptom free), and now he is afraid to take all drugs, because every time he has taken anything at all (Sudafed, aspirin, Benedryl, etc.), he has a relapse. Will this happen forever? Does anyone have an experience with this? Are there any drugs (perscription or not) that seem to be OK? What happens if he needs something for an illness in the future? The original drug that started this whole mess was a high-dose naporsin perscribed to him for arthritis pain.

    1. christibro40

      Hi Im Chris. I have SLE, The systemic form of Lupus. I was very hesitent to answer this question. I co-own a online support group for Lupus paitents and and do much of the research for the group, and wanted to make sure my information was accurate. I have read a lot about drug induced Lupus and all indicators say yes, he should be ok after the offending drug is stopped and out of his system.

      But after thinking about this one for a bit, I thought about my largest flare. It was from being in a house for over a year that we didnt know had toxic mold. We have since moved, and Im doing better, but I still have problems. Like if I have any expousre to mold in a building, certain cleaners, even things like plants outside. So I still have some sensitivities that may take a couple of years to fully get out of my system.

      That may be the same case with your family memeber with medications, and it may be an issue for the rest of his life and mine. Your also saying he was perscribed naprosin for arthritis pain. The thing is that is not one of the Lupus inducing drugs. If he already has arthritis, it may mean he has a mild case of it already, and that it comes and goes depending on what he is taking in.

      My suggestion is that he goes back to a rhuemotologist to get another autoimmune panal done, where they can test his ANA, Anti DNA- AntiSM and the rest, and see if any of it comes back positive. Im also going to give you the 11 critera for Lupus. To have it you must have met 4 at one point or another during your life. Drugs or no drugs. Let him see it, and he needs to think about his health history and report it to a doctor.

      Diagnostic criteria for lupus
      The following criteria are used to distinguish lupus (systemic lupus erythematosus, or SLE) from other autoimmune and rheumatic diseases.

      A person with 4 of these 11 conditions can be diagnosed with lupus; 3 symptoms suggest that lupus is probably present, and 2 raise the possibility of lupus. Symptoms may be present all at once or appear in succession over a period of time. 1

      Butterfly (malar) rash on cheeks
      Rash on face, arms, neck, torso (discoid rash)
      Skin rashes that result from exposure to sunlight or ultraviolet light (photosensitivity)
      Mouth or nasal ulcers, usually painless
      Joint swelling, stiffness, pain involving two or more joints (arthritis)
      Inflammation of the membranes surrounding the lungs (pleuritis) or heart (pericarditis). This inflammation is called serositis.
      Abnormalities in urine, such as increased protein or clumps of red blood cells or kidney cells, called cell casts, in the urine
      Nervous system problems, such as seizures or psychosis, without known cause
      Problems with the blood, such as reduced numbers of red blood cells (anemia), platelets, or white blood cells
      Positive antinuclear antibody (ANA) test
      Signs of increased autoimmunity (antibodies against normal tissue), as shown by laboratory tests

      I hope this helps
      Chris

      Ill also include a couple links

  44. Alias

    I have a family member who has lupus and has chronic flares she says she’s in constant pain but she wont see?
    rhemutoligist she takes medicine but its pain medicine. Does her not treating the lupus decrease her life expectancy, and if so how many years can she live with untreated lupus? Will it eventually cripple her?

    1. Linda R

      Untreated lupus can result in permanent organ damage and even organ failure. She is treating the symptoms and not the cause. The cause of her pain is that her immune system is attacking healthy parts of herself. The only way to stop that is to take immunosuppressive drugs.

      No one can predict life span. People with lupus are up to 6 times more likely to have heart attacks and strokes because of the chronic inflammation. The immunosuppressives help bring the inflammation under control. Lupus does not destroy joints the way rheumatoid arthritis does. But the constant pain means she will not want to exercise leading to loss of flexibility and range of motion as well as conditions like heart disease and obesity.

      All that said, she is an adult. You can give her the facts. You can’t make her take care of herself. But as long as the family is giving her attention by worrying for her, she doesn’t have to bother. Lay out the proof and let her decide. You can’t control this.

  45. Ella-Jane C

    Why are my family so unsupportive about mental health things ?
    Mental health issues run in my family. My father was an alcoholic, my mother has OCD (but denies it), my gran used to have anxiety (but no one talks about it), my brother has anger issues and depression . I lived in a domestically violent house and was bullied badly at school and also attacked when i was 15 .

    BUT my mum doesn’t allow us to bring up anything, its all hushed up. My auntie too was ill and my family actually call her the “nutcase” and my mum makes me ignore her if we say see her in the supermarket .

    I have so much anxiety , not only because of my panic disorder, but also because of the nature in which my family treat other members of my family. My mum says that my grandmother was a wimp because she couldn’t contorl her nerves and she shouts at me to 2pull myself together” over my panic attacks.

    I begged her when i was 15 to take me to a doctor but she told me id be locked up and given electoconvulsive treatment (you know that thing in one flew over the coo coo’s nest) . I saw the doctor myself and he said i should just relax more and refused to give me medication . I cant offord private and so I think my doctor is trying not to allow me to see a therapist (comes out his budget) .

    I tried another doctor and she told me becasue i have other medical issues, im on immunosuprresants for lupus, she couldnt prescribe me anything at all.

    Im so ill now i can barely cope , i fear im going to crack up . I keep everthing to myself. My friend has depression and takes paxil or something i looked it up online and im thinking of buying it. I honestly dont care if it would kill me becase at the moment i dont much care about anything.

    Also, my family ridicule my illness calling me lazy as i spend alot of time sleeping. My mum screams at me to grow up as im 20 now. Ive lost most of my friends and im envious and fristrated about my family who dont seem to want to spare me just an hour to tell them how bad i feel.

  46. Atlas

    How do you personally cope with depression, and are you open about having it?
    I haven’t been diagnosed with having depression, and most people who know me wouldn’t believe that I have it because I come across as being very positive and happy but I believe that I am experiencing something more than just teenage angst or whatever. I feel like I have these weights just pulling me down emotionally, and dancing and running and sunlight and eating well and all the other mood-elevators of the past just don’t bring me back up anymore. I’ve recently gone into remission for Hodgkin’s Lymphoma, and I should be feeling better, not worse, but this past year was really brutal. I was in a support group for teens who had cancer or blood diseases, and two passed away. Prior to cancer, one of my best friends died of Lupus and I lost a lot of family members back to back. It’s been a total of 10 people in three years. I feel like my youth is gone. I’m just 17 – just shy of 18 – and I feel like I’m so much older. I don’t identify with normal kids anymore at all. I got into my dream college and I’ve got so much going for me, and I just don’t care about any of it right now.

    I’ll stay in my PJs half the day now when I can, I let my room become a gross disaster, I’m apathetic about my well being and I just force myself to eat and take my meds, but I don’t really want to do either. I don’t know what I should do to treat this. How do *you* treat your depression?

    1. ziggy

      I’m sorry you’re having a hard time. I think you’re probably right about feeling that you’re depressed. Especially after everything you’ve gone through yourself and losing all those people in your life. That is quite traumatic.

      I too struggle with depression, due to abuse and possible genetic makeup. I take medication for anxiety as needed but at the moment am not on anything for depression. I find its really important to get as much sleep as I need or I start spiralling.

      There are some days when I turn off the phone, stay in my pjs and sleep as long as possible. This happened about 2x a week the past 2 months, during summer holidays. I’m back at work now which is good. I need a routine and place to go most days to help me keep myself in some sort of balance. I have a sewing hobby that I take with me to a friend’s place when I’m not working and surround myself with supportive people. Sometimes I’ll color or cut my hair to help myself feel new/er. 🙂 Spending time with my children and grandchildren helps as well. My grandchildren help me see things more as new beginnings.

      My new goal in life is to simply love others and help others to feel better about themselves or help make their situations a little easier – nothing big and splashing just in passing or in a casual way. When I’m depressed and think about this goal, it spurrs me on to step outside of myself and directs my attention away from my issues to others. Like taking a break from myself.

      Some days I have to force myself to leave my home, to even look outside, but once I’m out there, I start to feel lighter. Some days I simply have to ride with the depression and tell myself, this too shall pass and the sun will shine and I will be happier again. I have to accept that the good times too will pass and the cycle will begin again, but there will be good in there as well. In public, like you, I put my best face forward, and most people don’t know unless I tell them that I struggle with depression. Sometimes I’m not able to put my best face forward and at that time, its best to take care of me at home.

      Depression is a reality. I have a good friend that I talk with and know that I’m loved. That is really important to me. I wish I could be more open in a general way with people around me every day but that’s just not my personality. I don’t want someone on the other side of my workplace getting the low down from someone I confided in. I admire people who can be more open than I am. I don’t mind sharing here because of anonymity.

  47. leta

    DDT exposure in the USA?
    a family member was exposed to high volumes of DDT in the 70’s.
    he had some symptoms that came and went over the years but now they have excellerated(has all the symptoms of MS, but the test have been inconclusive to this day)..
    here are some of the symtoms: blurred vision,spots,and wavy lines in the eyes and eye pain, open sores that wont heal, debilitating headaches, legs,toes arms and hands are tingling and numb at times, cognitve thinking is impaired,has a hard time expressing what he needs, urinary pain, legs give out at times the list could go on and on..
    I was wondering how many other people have experienced these symptoms after long term exposure?
    He has been tested for Lymes,thyroid,cancer,MS,Lupus etc.

  48. Sheny

    What to do with my 37yr old sister that thinks she knows it all?
    First of all she has Lupus and her emotions are linked to it. So the whole family avoids agreuments with she and I think she knows this, so she takes advanage and uses it againt us and it really makes me mad. Yesterday we go into a very heated argument (most of the time I bit my tunge) and she never wants to admit that she is wrong and if you dont agree with her she get upsent and make me feel like I was wrong and that regarles what I say am wrong and she is always right. And according to other family members they feel the same. How can I handle her with out making her upset.

    1. ♪ ♫ ☮ NYbron ☮ ♪ ♫

      You’re going to have to always keep your temper when you’re around her; if you get angry, it’ll all be your fault, not hers anyway. The question is what is your personal philosophy on people? Do you feel that they can change? What benefit would it be for you to be right and for her to be wrong? You have to ask yourself if it’s worth it to be right even though you are right. Unfortunately for you it’s a difficult situation because you obviously care about her and love her otherwise you wouldn’t worry about making her upset. It sounds like you want to keep the family together. If you didn’t care, then you would just try to avoid her and not talk to her or move away so you wouldn’t have to see her anymore. If she has Lupus then maybe there are some neurological problems underlying her anger. That doesn’t make her right. She probably doesn’t even know she has a problem with anger and illogical thinking. Maybe you should persuade her to talk to her doctor about what the family thinks and he could look into the possiblity of prescribing some medicine for her. It’s a bad situation all around, and I sympathize with you .. there aren’t any easy answers here, and I’m afraid I haven’t been much help.

  49. Moriah D

    What are the chances a military spouse with lupus would get cleared for joining their husband in South Korea?
    My husband is stationed in South Korea and has recently been asked if he would like to extend his tour to get command sponsorship for his family. From what he has been told, they are trying to get everyone stationed there for longer periods of time like the other Army bases located in Europe. In other words, they are trying to make it a regular duty station. I have to enroll in the Exceptional Family Member Program because I have recently been diagnosed with Systemic Lupus Erythematosos. Then, from the medical records and physical I provide them, they will decide whether I qualify for placement overseas. I have not had any major complications with the disease, but I am on prednisone and plaquenil. My husband is really excited about the possiblilty of being together again and I would like to know as much as I can about the process and the probabilty of me being able to go. My husband was not placed at an army base in the states before he was shipped to Korea. He went to Korea right out of AIT. Basically, I am wanting information on the EFMP screening process and any additional thoughts that may be relevant. Any milspouses that have been in my situation, your advice and input will be greatly appreciated. Thank you for any ideas you can contribute. Happy Holidays to All!!! Thank you, again.

    1. Linda R

      I never have understood the rhyme or reason of the military, but I would get a letter from your rheumy and any other docs basically saying that your lupus is well controlled and that you have no major complications.

      I have SLE with multiple organ involvement, but am in remission now. What I have learned is that you should write the letter for the doctor, then let him or her edit it as they see fit. Doctors are busy and the easier you make it on them the more successful you are likely to be.

      Good luck to you. You might want to check and see that plaquenil will be available to you there or that you have a way to get it. Prednisone should be no problem.

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